Monday, 6 May 2013

Home sweet home


We've been home a week and already it's beginning to feel as if we've never even been away.

Being away from my normal life gave me time to think, to think about the things that weigh me down, the things that I want to change and the things I want to achieve. Since closing my fruit and vegetable delivery business in March I've been a bit lost, working was a big part of my identity and without my job I didn't really know who I was, it felt like the thing I did that made me "worthwhile" had gone. Not to mention the feeling of failure at having not been able to run a profitable business. Best not to dwell on that. Running a home, caring for a husband and three children and caretaking 10 acres, often without said husband ranks pretty low in my own sense of worthiness. Why is this? Why am I so hard on myself? It's time to change my thinking. The wise and lovely Rhonda from the Down to Earth blog talks a lot about the worthiness and validity of working at home and her posts encourage and inspire me.

I'm lucky enough to have the choice to be at home and I want to embrace it and value it. I've made this fairly random list of things that might help me achieve the sense of worthiness I'm seeking:

:: I want to be more organised at home. I'm going to start by creating a loose schedule for myself to break the days/time up and make sure there is time for everything I need to do and everything I'd like to do
:: I want to investigate wholefoods more and gently steer our diet in a new direction, oh and menu plan, not knowing what's for dinner can make me a very grumpy lady in the afternoon
:: I want to make time for creating/crafting every day. I want to stop treating it as a luxury and value it for the peace and calm it brings me. I have sewing, quilting, knitting and stitching projects on the go and a head whirling with other ideas so I need to allow myself time to get on with things, guilt-free
:: I want to explore ways to create income from our land. Innerpickle is a huge inspiration. We already grow and sell free-range pork on a small scale but I'd love to investigate growing meat chickens and selling our meat to a local food co-op. I have this nagging feeling we could be doing so much more with our 10 acres.
:: I want to have a craft stall at our school fair in November, I'm thinking of sewing bucket hats to sell and or little purses,
:: I want to connect more with like-minded bloggers and people in my community, there's so much I'd like to learn

I think that's enough of a list to make a start with....

Does anyone else feel the same sense of unworthiness about their work at home versus employment?
Anyone care to share how they organise themselves?

4 comments:

  1. Hi Julie, I've been following your adventures for a wee while, and thought it was time I said hello! Yes there's nothing like being away from home to give you a bit of perspective and thinking space. I've just had a wee trip away and thought alot about where I want to "be at". The first 3 on your list could be from mine! I actually need to right the list instead of just thinking about it! S:)

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    1. Hi Sally, nice to "meet you", thanks for saying Hi! Good luck with your list...
      Julie :)

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  2. Well this is worthy of a 3 day weekend but thoughts for today include: beware the list that takes time to write. You could have done some knitting in that time.
    It is much more helpful to list what you have done rather than what you think you should do. That way you finish with a list of accomplishment rather than a sense of failure.
    Somebody tells us that your agegroup will have at least 3 completely separate careers so Mother slots in very nicely between lawyer and the next phase.
    There is no greater gift to our society than raising 3 socially responsible contributing adults and they do not raise themselves. You are doing a fabulous job.
    But you can always change your job title...Whole Food Nutritionist? Negotiator?B&B manager?

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    1. Aww thank you for your kind and encouraging words. I'm looking forward to this weekend xx

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